Dancing the Vision Into Reality: Beginning with the First Step
I keep getting images of dancers in my mind.
I wish you could see it because these dancers are truly beautiful. I can’t fully tell if it’s me or someone else; sometimes it’s one dancer and sometimes it’s a group, or it morphs in between. When I see the movement, it’s so connected, so emotional, so expressive, so intoxicating… I’m in the movement, the emotion and the expression of the dancer.
Movement That Speaks
The music is meditative, the movement is mobilizing, and the energy is intense – high but controlled – powerful – intentional. I find myself dreaming about working with these dancers, teaching them the steps I see… but I immediately get overwhelmed because it's freestyle, and it can’t be taught. How do I get this creation out of my mind and body and onto a stage… This is the question I find myself asking.
I want to create a show. Sounds wild from a former psychotherapist used to sitting in a chair still in thought. The thing is, all my deep thoughts, intense feelings, and desires aren’t meant for more than just pen and paper… I feel it deeper inside me that they’re meant to be on display. The creative part of me is demanding another level or type of expression. “You need to dance.” “You need to dance.” “You need to dance.” Is it me? Or others? Or both?
A Call to Dance
I dream of a show or a workshop that speaks to you. Directly to you. With words, movement, emotion, and energy that can’t be captured in black words on a white page. I dream of teaching you how to dance to heal. To express yourself, your creativity, your pain your emotions in a way that bring resolve and freedom. I dream of you dancing and you being healed.
The inspiration is real, and it makes me excited to think about being able to create such masterpeices. I always thought of dance as a recreational pastime that helps me stay regulated and healthy, but now I want it to be more. I want to be confident that I am a dancer, a choreographer, a creative.
The Doubts That Creep In
This makes me cry, thinking how good this idea feels. It also makes me cry because the how and the money come in, making me think “you’re gonna have to pay for all of this” and “there’s no return on investments in the arts.” Damn, that’s a really discouraging thought… If I let that thought be true, then it will be true. I won’t pursue this vision, and then there will be no chance to make important connections, take pleasure in my passion projects, and then make money. I’m learning to not make money the reason I do or don’t do something - I don’t want to be controlled by money.
I don’t want to be reckless, but I don’t want to be stuck…so for now I’m going to hold it as a good idea. It’s a really good idea, and it’s a good one to pursue. Maybe a better way of approaching it would be to ask myself, “What’s the next step?” before I put it on the shelf to collect dust.
Just Begin
As I sit here in Cabo, in a hostel with no privacy, I know this is not where I want to create and the reminder that I made a connection with a dancer here in Cabo who has a dance studio pulls at me to message him and request to use his space to begin. That’s all it is. Just begin. That’s the first step… and it makes me so excited… because the next step comes after the first step, and so all I have to do is begin. The rest will fall into place.
These are my honest and raw thoughts,
Katie
UPDATE: I reached out to a local dancer and choreographer and proposed we collab on a workshop and she said yes! We’re in the process of planning out a beautiful safe space for you to move and heal! No prior dance experience required. I can’t wait. Send me an email or DM if you’re interested, so I can let you know when it gets launched :)
